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Joke of the Day

"A boy calls 911 Boy: Hello? I need your help! 911 Operator: What's your emergency? Boy: Two girls are fighting over me! 911 Operator: So what's the problem? Boy: The ugly one is winning."

"Woah guys, did you hear Oxygen and Magnesium got together? OMg!"

"Saw a chameleon today... must've been a really shitty chameleon."

"What's the difference between handguns and feminists? A handgun only has one trigger."

"I hate when someone texts me cause then I can't post anything on the internet or they'll know I'm ignoring them."

"When I retire I plan to study oceanography. (I'll eat like a shark, drink like a fish and lay on the beach like a whale)"

"yo mommas so poor the roaches pay the light bill!"

"""I'm going to France next summer."" ""Oh, really?"" ""No, De Gaulle."""

"Why don't they play poker in the savanna? because there are too many cheetahs. Thank you i will be here all day."

"A lady asked me if I had any gum this morning I replied ""Sorry, I don't have any Extra"""