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Joke of the Day

"Racist jokes are like a suicide bomber They really clear the room."

"Accidentally pressed the soap dispenser instead of the toothpaste. Mouth feels clean but I don't think I'll be able to curse today. Shucks."

"Is it true that Martha Washington had wooden boobs?"

"What do you call a slow hurricane? A slowicane."

"Officer: We're building the Death Star as fast as we can. Vader: I have new ways to motivate you. *implements margarita Tuesdays*"

"What happened to the body builder ...whose favorite gym closed down? He was depressed."

"You know what happens when you put the toilet seat up? that's the joke"

"If a rapper named e came out as gay He would say E=MCQUEERED"

"Scientists claim that the Big Bang was the loudest noise that has ever occured in history. They obviously haven't met my kids."

"I tried to buy some camouflage pants the other day... But, I couldn't find any."