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Joke of the Day
"Is it true that Martha Washington had wooden boobs?"
Next Joke
"Dear Tequila, we had a deal last night. You were supposed to make me funnier, smarter and a better dancer. I saw the video, we need to talk"
"*guitarist breaks guitar* HELL YEAH *drummer throws drums* YES YES *singer stabs a bunch of guys* OH MY GOD *bassist plants a bomb* STOP"
"I like my chocolate like I like my men. Rich."
"Opened a can of Pillsbury rolls and was reminded of why I shouldn't wear skinny jeans."
"Scared the hell out of a stranger by sayin' ""good morning"" to 'em. That's a thing people used to do. Google it"
"I became a bisexual when I got married. I get sex twice a year whether I want it or not."
"A priest and a rabi are walking down the street... And they see a little boy. The priest says,""Hey, we should go screw that little boy."" And the rabi says,""Oh yeah? Out of what."""
"even if u realy hate sombody, u shoud never insult their physical apearance!!! bc as soon as u dig deeper u will find much stronger insults"
"im a cat and i FREaking love turning potential energy into kinetic *pushes glass off table* your going to feed and keep me for some reason"