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Joke of the Day

"Rick Astley will let you borrow any movie from his Pixar collection except one... ...he's never gonna give you *Up.*"

"A black man goes into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder... The bartender looks at the parrot and says, ""Wow! That's a beauty. Where'd you get him?"" The parrot replies, ""Africa""."

"It's pretty rude how they'll kick you out of the hospital just for using a defibrillator to make a grilled cheese sandwich."

"If you're in college, what do you do when your flatmate has an epileptic seizure in the bathtub? ...throw in your dirty laundry."

"Why is there no Mexican olympics? because all the ones who can run, jump and swim have already crossed the border"

"People ask me what my secret is to losing weight and I tell them not having money to buy food"

"Just came across a very strange porn site....took me ages to clean it off my screen"

"There are two types of people in this world, Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data."

"So I asked my North Korean friend how's life there He said he can't complain"

"I electrified a clickbait journalist's toilet. Number 2 will shock them."