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Joke of the Day

"Mother Earth: I'm not a regular mom. I'm a Cool Mom. [humans pollute the atmosphere and destroy nature] Earth: This is fine. I'm a Cool Mom"

"I used to work in a shoe-recycling shop. It was sole-destroying. - Alex Horne"

"*accidentally likes a hot girl's photo of a sandwich from 3 years ago*"

"Of course size matters. No one wants a small pizza"

"I wasn't upset about that black cat crossing my path but mouthing ""you're fucked"" as he passed was just rude."

"Girls who are easy on the eyes are usually hard on the balls and wallet."

"I got drunk last night and my house wasn't where I left it."

"Why did the witch get a car with manual transmission? Because she prefers to drive stick!"

"Teacher: Why are you late Joseph? Joseph: Because of a sign down the road. Teacher: What does a sign have to do with your being late? Joseph: The sign said ""School Ahead Go Slow!"""

"I uploaded a video about viruses on YouTube.. It went viral 8D"