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Joke of the Day
"Wanna hear a joke? My bank account... :("
Next Joke
"Why was the chronic masturbater restrained to his hospital bed? He kept trying to discharge himself"
"I don't know why I just bought some coconut shampoo.... ...I don't even have any coconuts"
"America and Britain are in a race... to see who can fuck up their country more. Britain is winning at the moment but America sure has a Trump card."
"Why shouldn't you buy a Unionmade watch? For every day it's working, it will break twice, yet still skips ahead half an hour while you're eating lunch."
"Finding that one slob at the gym who's in worse shape than you is the best feeling. The worst is realizing ""he"" is a mirror."
"What's the difference between a joke on Reddit and a joke on 9Gag? One was posted yesterday and the other's already been posted."
"For eggplant your guests will love, lightly brush with olive oil, toss in the air and blast that bad boy with your ankle piece."
"Once I've repeated what I said for the third time, I have to tell my dark family secret: I come from a long line of mumblers."
"Dentist: ok open up ""Well I guess it all started when my dad left..."" Dentist: no I mean- Assistant: wait bill...let him finish"