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Joke of the Day

"I didn't sleep at all last night I stayed up all night wondering where the sun went... and then it dawned on me."

"I like girls who don't study. Because they want the D."

"Why are Reebok Pumps shoes so expensive? Inflation."

"Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? Because he doesn't want anyone to know he's screwing a chicken."

"When I see lovers' names carved in a tree, I don't think it's cute. I just find it strange how many people have knives on a date."

"According to rom coms, I haven't met the perfect guy because I've never chased an important paper down the block in a gust of wind."

"What's the most sensitive part of a man's body when he's masturbating? His ears."

"People that say ""The worst kind of cut is a paper cut"" probably haven't been stabbed in the face before."

"If any pandas are reading this: neat!"

"Why don't you see many chemists with master's degrees working with acids and bases? To really understand acids and bases, you need a pHd."