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Joke of the Day

"My son is a real hand full. I didn't have any tissues handy."

"During the day I don't believe in ghosts, But at night I'm a little bit more open minded"

"""Hey."" ""Hey."" ""What's up?"" ""Nothing."" END OF CONVERSATION."

"Where did the engine go after he retired? To live in a motor home"

"what fandom, despite only 1 book in the franchise, has been obsesing over it since the begeinning? christianity"

"People form Pittsburgh are called Pittsburgers. Do you know what people from Hamburg are called? Germans"

"A Jew, a woman, and a racist walk into a bar. The bartender says ""I bet you thought this was going to be about the elections, didn't you?"""

"My girlfriend asked me the other day, ""Dave, why do you always walk in front of me?"" I said, ""I'm sorry, I don't follow you."""

"I'm coming down the home stretch of the semester... its getting tough, my work is starting to pile up faster then the rape allegations against Bill Cosmy"

"If I haven't said something mildly offensive today I'm sorry and I promise to try harder"