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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a fat skeleton? big boned"

"Two tectonic plates are having a heated argument... They seem to have diverging opinions."

"Apparently mime on mime violence is a real problem, you just don't hear about it."

"When is the NFL going to start drafting players with mental handicaps? Have you ever seen a video of them getting the ball and not scoring a touchdown?"

"If we have sex in the dark, there's a 50% chance that I'll put it in the wrong hole and a 100% chance that I did it on purpose."

"Why are astrophysicists always nervous before they launch a new satellite? It can be a very Hubble-ing experience. These jokes may not be funny for you, but they are Fermi."

"A black man with a parrot on his shoulder walks into a bar, and the impressed bartender asks: ""Where'd you get that? "" The parrot shrieks.... ""*AFRICA!*"""

"Can we have a thread with alternative endings to traditional jokes? I'll start: Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a registered six offender."

"Why did the Polish man think his wife was plotting to murder him? He found a bottle of polish remover on her dresser"

"I apologize for referring to your newborn baby as a Questionable Spinoff"