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Joke of the Day

"A Lizard lost its tail... but it got one back from a retail shop!"

"TRUTHFUL TUESDAY: When my son was 7 he pissed me off so badly I pressed all the elevator buttons knowing every new rider would blame him."

"I just rinsed with mouthwash to cover up the m&ms on my breath. Being an adult is stupid."

"The pen is mightier than the sword. Also, parking a car in someone's living room sends a pretty damn clear message too."

"i was dating a hot air balloonist at least she let me down gently"

"What did one boob say to the other? You're my breast friend. Badum tits"

"What do you call violence in the kitchen? Assault and pepper"

"I'm really worried of discrimination based on skin color during the Trump regime The thing is, unfortunately, I'm not orange..."

"Nothing is too good for my girlfriend on Valentines day... I tried to get her nothing, but she was too good for that."

"Why is there so little Puerto Rican literature? Because the spray paint can wasn't invented until 1949."