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Joke of the Day

"[diary, day 3642 on deserted island] How can I still be fat?"

"If Robin Williams was a Redditor, he wouldn't go Karma Farming He's go Goodwill Hunting"

"Whats the difference between Elton John and a refrigerator? The refrigerator doesn't fart when you take the meat out."

"How can you face you problem ..if your problem is your face"

"It's like taking candy from a baby - A GOOD IDEA IF YOU DON'T WANT THE BABY TO LOSE ITS FEET TO DIABETES BEFORE IT TURNS ONE."

"A criminal tried to escape federal jurisdiction by running across the southern border, but then he had a sudden realization.. He was in Tasmania"

"Hub: What's this? Me: A divorce jar. Every time we fight you put a dollar in & I'm a little closer to freedom. Hub: *puts $100 in* Me:..."

"I'd like to tell a joke about Dratini... Only urbanites will get it."

"The inventor of the Frisbee died yesterday. Per his final wishes, he'll be thrown onto the roof and forgotten about until next summer."

"I asked my redneck friend what he thought of the Trans-Pacific Partnership He said that as long as they don't marry, then he's okay with it."