65138

Joke of the Day

"""What are you typing? Let me guess. Oh wait, stop right there, I know what it is. It's not that? Okay wait.. I know it, I know it!"" -Google."

"New BMWs don't have a dipstick located in the engine anymore They're now located in the driver seat"

"If you encounter a bear DON'T RUN. Maintain eye contact. Keep maintaining it. Fall in love. Marry the bear. Tell story to your grandbearbies"

"Why don't computers have any brothers? They are all trans-sisters."

"Did you hear that joke about mosquitoes? it's malarious."

"Only trust people that like big butts. They cannot lie."

"Just saw the little boy next door licking whip cream off the cat. Pretty sure he heard something he shouldn't have."

"Did you hear about the man with five dicks? His pants fit like a glove. I'm so sorry. So sorry."

"Why did the medium cross the road? To get to The Other Side! ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha"

"""WHAT DO WE WANT?!"" ""SELF-CONFIDENCE!"" ""WHEN DO WE WANT IT?!"" *everyone breaks eye contact and starts mumbling*"