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Joke of the Day

"In what direction do five gay guys walk?"

"Q: Why are farmers cruel? A: They pull corn by the ears."

"Babies are the two extremes on the spectrum of smell. They either smell like heaven filled with lollipops or a microwaved porta-potty."

"You cannot eat me unless you spread me. -Butter"

"When I was a little kid, I would wait up all night waiting for santa to come. Then there was an awkward silence when he got up, put his pants on, and left."

"Q: Why do you look out the window in the morning? A: Because you can't see through walls, and you can't see anything at night anyway."

"Yo mama so fat... She takes up more mass than her thin friend."

"A guy tells his friend a long sleeping joke, which his friend hates. ""That was a bed joke,"" said his listening friend."

"My Dad finally said that I was funny. I asked him if he loved me."

"What do you call a bird who wants to have a different personality? An alter eagle!"