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Joke of the Day

"I get knocked down, but I get up again, and you're never, oh you knocked me down again, you are being very rude"

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"[nsfw] What do you call an anorexic girl with a yeast infection? A quarter-pounder with cheese."
"Wife : Even if you cheated on me, I wouldn't leave you. Me : Really? Wife : Yes. Why would I reward you for cheating?"
"A fax machine is just a surprise printer."
"Monks teach peace and harmony, but they sure do seem to like resistance.. Ohmmmmmm."
"Why didn't the monster use toothpaste? Because he said his teeth weren't loose."
"Knock knock. Who's there? Mormons."
"What did the ram say as his lover lay on her deathbed? There will never be another ewe."
"How does a plant walk? It uses a plant stand."
"A skeleton walks into a bar... And says ""gimme a beer and a mop."""