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Joke of the Day

"Hate it when people ask me what I will be doing five years from now Come on guys, I don't have 2020 vision"

"My girlfriend and I were practicing safe sex... i told her sex with a condom on doesn't usually feel as good. she pulled it off"

"Why do Mexicans always install those tiny steering wheels in their cars? So they can drive with the handcuffs on."

"We go to college to get a good job to buy an expensive tv to watch truck drivers on the discovery channel."

"Why did princess Diana cross the road? Because she wasn't wearing her seatbelt."

"Why did the prostitute cross the road? To go to the motel with her client so they could have some fucking privacy."

"Q: Where do ghosts live? A: At the dead end."

"I'm so out of shape Internet Explorer could probably run faster than me"

"When I was a kid, I used to pray every night for a new bike... Then I realised that The Lord doesn't work that way, so I stole one and asked him to forgive me."

"How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? That's not funny."