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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the cannibal that passed his friend in the jungle? He got so excited, he threw up his arms!"

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"Why don't you play Uno with a Mexican? Because they take all the green cards. (friend at work told me this gem)"
"Before NASA sent Curiosity, Mars was bustling with cats."
"Hyper intelligent student Teacher: whoever answers my next question, can go home. Teacher: India is on which continent? Boy: potato! He leaves for home then."
"Why legalize weed? Because it's 2015... http://i.imgur.com/PmlEqZ9.jpg"
"I was so happy my mail order bride arrived today. My Wife wasn't. She did say I can use the crate as a doghouse. Odd, we don't own a dog."
"Saw a bad accident from my hot air balloon so I tried landing to help but just ended up killing everyone even worse"
"The fun way to tell if a celebrity is crazy is by how many times they delete and reactivate their Twitter account."
"How to win an argument with a deaf girl? Turn off the lights."
"What did the Mexican princess ask her sister? Tijuana build a snowman?"