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Joke of the Day

"I don't answer unexpected knocks on the door in case it's the beginning of a very polite Zombie Apocalypse."

"I used to love John Deere and Massey Ferguson... but now I'm an ex-tractor fan."

"What's the best thing about alzheimers? You're always meeting new people."

"I bet my butcher 50 that he couldn't reach the meat on the top shelf. He said ""No, the steaks are too high""."

"Did anyone else go into Monsters, Inc. thinking it was going to be a movie about a really big sink?"

"College My son took Rock Climbing in college but he had to drop the class. He couldn't find any ""Cliff Notes."""

"My brain keeps singing songs I don't even like."

"""What a nice doggie."" ""I'll have you know it's not a doggie but a pure bred."" ""YOU HAVE A DOG MADE OUT OF BREAD??!!!!"""

"An app to tase restaurant owners who call appetizers ""apps"""

"The Prophylactic Why did the prophylactic fly across the room? It was peed off."