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Joke of the Day

"Alien: We've returned, show us what you built with our technology Egyptians: ... Aliens: ... Egyptians: ok don't be mad"

"There once was... There once was a woman with dementia and she"

"What did the man say after his wife was dragged off the beach by a seal? Welp, seal ate her."

"I keep trying to e-mail Mubarak, but all I get is ""Out of Office""."

"Which U.S. State has the smallest soft drinks? Minnesota."

"What's the difference.... Between eating pussy and driving in the fog? When you're driving in the fog you can't see the asshole in front of you"

"What's your favorite pick up line? Mine is the Ford F Series."

"How do you know when someone is gluten free? Don't worry, they'll tell you. ""Exit stage right...."""

"Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a registered six offender."

"How much does a pirate pay for corn? A buck an ear"