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Joke of the Day

"Why did the scarecrow get a promotion? Because he was outstanding in his field."

"Did you know Cecil was a black lion? And man, even in Africa, the white people **STILL** be killing tiggas."

"Did you all hear Jerry Sandusky is getting a custom ipod touch? It will be known as the itouch kids!"

"What's the deal with the phrase ""door ajar""? I mean, is it a door or is it a jar?"

"My nieces just asked me if God is real. I'm tired so I'm just going to show them ""The Exorcist."" This babysitting stuff is a breeze!"

"I'm trying to bring a taco into this club...let's see if the bouncer finds it when he frisks me"

"Not many people knew that Albert Einstein had a brother that was an evil scientist that experimented with cadavers. His name was Frank"

"Ask your doctor if left is right for you."

"What's the difference between a Palestinian woman and a Mackerel? ... One is greasy with big eyes. The other's a fish."

"ME: *smashes bottle into a ship* MAN: Oh cool, what are you naming it? ME: I'm not *smashes another bottle* I just hate ships"