148232

Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a Palestinian woman and a Mackerel? ... One is greasy with big eyes. The other's a fish."

"[at interview] Interviewer: tell me a little about yourself. Me: I'd rather not. I kinda want this job."

"Where do cows go when they die? Burgertory"

"Why are women and children evacuated first in an emergency? So the men can think of a solution in silence."

"The neck pillow I was using on the Greyhound bus turned out to be an adult diaper somebody left on the seat."

"When Gregor Mendel did his groundbreaking experiments with pea plants, ... ...it was a classic case of publish or parish."

"How do you start a rave in ethiopia? Tape a piece of toast to the roof."

"Why are men smarter while having sex? Because they're plugged into a know it all."

"HELLO, 911? I'M FALLING DOWN AN ELEVATOR SHAFT. YES, RIGHT NOW. VERY SLOWLY, THAT'S HOW. HOLD ON, SOMEONE JOINED. WHOA, NOW WE'RE FALLING UP"

"Whats the difference between a piano, a tuna, and a bottle of glue? Anyone can tune a piano, but noone can piano a tuna!"