629

Joke of the Day

"There's a 100% chance the Republicans will discuss Starbucks cups in a debate tonight, so remember that when they ask how they lost in 2016."

"What kind of street does a ghost like best? A dead end."

"What's the easiest way to find a gay West Virginian? All his cousins are male!"

"M'eal *tips waiter*"

"A man is on trial for beating his wife with his guitar collection The judge asks, ""first offender""? The man replies, ""No, first a Gibson; then a Fender."""

"the main use of the tiny toe (the smallest toe in your foot) is finding corners of furniture in the dark"

"How many goals did Germany score? A brazillian"

"[invents time machine and goes back to the dinosaurs] ""in a few years its gonna be really cold"" *hands them mixtape* ""you're gone need this"""

"A coffee shop opened up inside a strip club Its name is ""Grinds for Divorce"""

"A priest checks into a hotel and asks the girl on reception ""I hope porn channel is disabled"".... The girl replies with ""No. It's just the normal stuff you sick fuck""."