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Joke of the Day

"What's orange and sounds like a parrot? a carrot..."

"Did you hear Miley Cyrus and her new boyfriend broke up? It wasn't twerking out."

"i only watch superbowl for the commercials.i am unsure how to spend my surplus income &desperately need suggestions via talking animals"

"Why can't feminists change a light bulb? Because no matter how many you have they still can't change shit."

"How about putting that screaming kid on vibrate"

"So I hear Lil Wayne is in critical condition. I think it has to do with his lungs... He's always been a lil weezy."

"Now that I have teenagers I understand why some animals eat their young."

"A band director asked his band why it is so difficult for everybody to come in at the same time. A student replied saying... Mabey they all don't fit through the door."

"I'll tell you what I know about midgets... Very little"

"For a guy that could change water into wine, I'm surprised Jesus only got hammered once."