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Joke of the Day

"What language do pirates speak? Arrrrrrabic! A friend and I were extremely high and he thought of this.Good times."

"Realized it was time to seek help for my Twitter addiction after I opened a carton of eggs and said ""Oh look, 12 new followers!"""

"Where do 4 gay guys go? One Direction"

"What do you call John Cena in camouflage? Redundant"

"I've been really mad at my dad since he died... ...all he's done for the last 6 years is sit on his ash."

"at my high school reunion everyone kept asking where my date was so I finally told them my dog ate him. no one laughed"

"A book fell on my head a moment ago... I can only blame my shelf."

"Should have never gave my cat a lemon, now he's walking around like a sour puss."

"Who does Luke Skywalker ask to charge his lightsaber? Char-Jar Binks"

"Why did the chicken cross the road? To see his girlfriend on the other side, but then he got taken by McDonalds and crushed for chicken nuggets."