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Joke of the Day

"My brother got kicked out of his house by his wife for measuring his penis. For the record, it reaches the back of her sister's throat."

"""Dad, what's a sponsored tweet?"" ""A way for Twitter to make money, I guess. Now, pass the Metamucil with 100% Natural Psyllium Fiber."""

"Doggy style, because sometimes you both just like the same tv show."

"What did the lawyer say after the short trial? That was a brief case."

"If Trump becomes president, it won't be called the White House anymore He'll rename it the Exclusively White House"

"Help I lost my coat! I hope someone didn't jacket!"

"What's gray and can't fly? A parking lot."

"what does past, present, and future have in common? ...... tense"

"My girlfriend wanted me to make her feel like she's the only girl in the world. So I signed her up for Electrical Engineering."

"How many Vietnam vets does it take to change a lightbulb? YOU DON'T KNOW, MAN! YOU WEREN'T THERE!"