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Joke of the Day

"I feel bad for people without arms... ... They can't rapidly take off their bottoms when they need to take a massive dump."

"I remember last year... It's like it was yesterday."

"What's long and hard, except for Asians? Math class. Credit to troller_awesomeness"

"What is Forest Gump's Email password? 1Forest1"

"did u hear about the crow that landed a job? he works in a caw center. he's winging it for now but it might take off"

"What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? Run like hell! She's got a grenade in her mouth!"

"Santa loves the rich kids more."

"Why do we let women and children off a sinking ship first? So the sharks aren't hungry anymore."

"the best way to hang up on someone is to do it in the middle of YOUR OWN sentence. that way, they never suspect you hung up on them."

"What's the plural of Ebola West Africa Credit goes to /u/Malfunkdung"