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Joke of the Day

"Q: You can sleep on it, brush your teeth with it and sit on it, what is it? A: A bed, a tooth brush, and a chair."

"My kids have voted, and the results are in. It's official, I've been elected the President of Empty Threats."

"Why women live longer than men? Because shopping never causes heart attacks, but paying bills does."

"What do you get when you cross a sheep and a porcupine? Nobody knows, but whatever it is, it knits its own sweaters."

"Coordinate geometry is terrible. I failed the last test, but it turns out that the next unit continues it. Will I ever get distance from it?"

"Apparently today is coming out day in Chile."

"There are two kinds of people in the world These who can extrapolate from incomplete data..."

"Where is the monster's temple? On the side of his head."

"What do you call a symphony of whales? An orcastra"

"my floor was 5 years old, so i contacted someone to replace the old wood... I'm still waiting for a reply"