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Joke of the Day

"Don't kiss me, I don't have the insulin for that. Tell me your diabetic jokes."

"Say ""I won a math debate"" 5 times really fast! Now slap yourself for being such a pervert."

"I used to be Irish... Then I became completely full of ire."

"Whats the last thing that went through the suicide bombers mind? His ass"

"Do you know what Mexicans think about Trump's wall? Who cares, they'll get over it.."

"Parents: ""Why don't you come socialize with the family?"" Me: *sits with family* *gets insulted by entire family* *goes back to bedroom*"

"20 years ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope, and Steve Jobs Now we have no money, no hope, or jobs."

"Did you hear about the constipated accountant? He just couldn't ""budge-it""."

"What do you call it when the Speaker of the House is angry? .... A raging Boehner."