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Joke of the Day

"Has anyone seen my sex doll? Of course I checked the tree house. Oh wait, it's here on the front lawn, still in your wedding dress LOL"

"How do you get a dog to stop humping your leg? pick it up and suck his dick"

"Campbell's Soup annual business meeting Current products are selling fine...See everyone next year."

"You shoulda never challenged me to a rap battle, Kim Jong Un! I'm about to end this man's whole Korea."

"What do you call an alligator in a vest? An in-vesti-gator!"

"An Italian classics professor... ...goes to a tailor to get his trousers mended. The tailor asks: ""Euripides?"" The professor replies: ""Yes. Eumenides?"""

"I spend way too much time deciding on whether I should use ""Lol"", ""Lmao"", ""Rofl"", or ""Haha"" in my text message."

"What does DNA stand for? National Dyslexia Association."

"Birds that land and then WALK across the street... what the hell is wrong with you?"

"Two blondes were walking down the railroad tracks. The first blonde said ""man, these steps are killing me!"" The second one said ""it's not the steps that are killing me, it's these low hand rails!"""