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Joke of the Day
"Birds that land and then WALK across the street... what the hell is wrong with you?"
Next Joke
"""So I was on a spaceship, and you were there, but it was not you, you know? Anyways..."" - MLK's less important dream"
"I'd like to go to Holland some day... Wooden shoe?"
"[sees co-worker the next day after failing to kill him on purge night] mondays am i right?"
"News has just come in that The Mars Rover has discovered a member of the feline species while exploring. Unfortunately, Curiosity killed the cat. Edit: this is /u/Onetap1's joke, credit goes to him"
"Why did the sorority girl add NaOH to her Frappuccino? Because she's a basic bitch."
"What does a man often wake with, but can never go to sleep with? An alarm, you pervert!"
"How do you recycle a condom Turn it inside out and shake the fuck out of it."
"Did you hear about the gay midget? He was just a little queer."
"The package of this pie is labeled ""Apple,"" yet these are clearly cherries. I'm not sticking my dick in this."