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Joke of the Day

"Does an Eskimo ever think about drizzling their house with delicious flavored syrups and eating it?"

"I just took my girlfriend to Hawaii... my wife was pissed. Credit: Old guy at work yesterday when I got back from Hawaii."

"Has anyone seen the trailer for the latest Tom Cruise movie? He can't go to the bathroom at all. It's called Mission Impissable."

"Q: Why did the invisible man look in the mirror? A: To make sure he still wasn't there."

"Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Because he's black."

"""Well ... I'll be dammed."" Bodies of water when they see beavers coming."

"If I were in a musical, I'd get fired in a week. Keep a straight face while someone looks in my eyes & sings to me? Nope. Sorry. Impossible."

"(-i)^2=-1. Moral: If you fiddle with imaginary problems too much, shit's gonna get real."

"""I couldn't work there after what he said to me..."" ""What did he say?"" ""You're fired."""

"What did the Mod say to OP? [deleted]"