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Joke of the Day

"If I were in a musical, I'd get fired in a week. Keep a straight face while someone looks in my eyes & sings to me? Nope. Sorry. Impossible."

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"It's crazy to see how much worse celebrities looked ""before they were famous"" and then realize that's how you look."
"I like my women like my beer... Cold and with the head blown off."
"Does anyone know any good Groundhog Day jokes? Because I keep hearing the same ones over and over"
"Why are there so many Smiths in the phonebook? Because they all own telephones"
"Scientists say the average size of the male penis has gone down to 5 inches. This just shows how big the Chinese population is getting."
"A grasshopper walks into a bar....... And the bar staff said to the grasshopper "" theres a drink named after you "" The Grasshopper replied "" theres a drink called bob?! """
"Yo momma's so white... When she passes through a prism more prisms come out"
"What does a waffle call his complete existential paradigm shift? His eggo death"
"My chiropractor is open on Martin Luther King Day, which makes me wonder... does he value back history over black history?"
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