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Joke of the Day

"Why were the early days of history called the dark ages? There were so many Knights"

"You can only enjoy Lord of the Rings if you're taking heroin... It's called high fantasy."

"Eskimo: If I did not know about God and sin, would I go to hell? Priest: No, not if you don't know Eskimo: Then why did you tell me?"

"I'd be the worst 911 Operator. ""Uh ma'am I think you mean he was lying in a puddle of his own blood, not laying."""

"After cribbing about yet another one of my Pranks, I told my girlfriend that she ""Can't take a Joke"" ""I let u put your cock in me don't I"" she replied."

"People ask me why I like the graveyard so much. I dig the graves."

"What does an army of fire ants have in common with a horny dolphin? Both come in waves."

"Told my girlfriend to watch out! It might smell in the bathroom... She asked if I had used the air freshener. ""yeah, I did"" ""Oh so it smells like shitrus."" man she's funny."

"This year I'm releasing a Christmas record called Duvet Know it's Christmas? It's a cover version."

"Why was the tired criminal delighted when he was caught by the police? Because he needed *arrest*!!!"