5686

Joke of the Day

"A man is in a car wreck and is rushed to the ER. When he wakes up he tells the doctor: ""I can't feel my legs!!!"" The doctor replies: ""I know, I cut your arms off."""

"Yo mama is so fat that when she fell in love She broke it."

"Doc: You have gallstones Me: Ugh. Doc: You can control it with diet. Me: Great! Doc: No chocolate, cheese, fried foods... Me: Take it out."

"What is a Muslim's favorite type of meat? Shalami! haha!"

"Gays in the military ""If gay men were allowed in the army, Saving Private Ryan will be a lot shorter, because it wouldn't take them 3 hours to find Matt Damon"" Adam Hills"

"What's the best part of a movie? The climax."

"Judging by the quality of some of your tweets I can tell this isn't the first time you've failed in life."

"Why couldn't Princess Leia find love? She was looking in Alderaan places."

"I've been stung by a bee."

"My wife is like listening to my favorite music with the volume up. Fucking the neighbour."