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Joke of the Day
"Don't sleep with family members... ...no matter how much they incest."
Next Joke
"My dad is my inspiration ...cause you never know when it's gonna hit you EDIT: missed a word"
"""Hey sorry Im overprotective, guess I just get nervous since I watched OUR FAMILY GET MURDERED!"" -What the dad on Finding Nemo shouldve said"
"What music service do potatoes like to use? Spudify."
"What did the parrot say when he was using the Internet? P.Cs of eight P.Cs of eight."
"A guy's ego."
"Jesus, take the wheel Carlos, take the stereo"
"hello secretary? i need you to go to that website where you can combine pokemon and combine mew and squirtle, print it out and bring it here"
"When driving: *shakes fist at pedestrians* When walking: *shakes fist at motorists* When running: *shakes fist at the murderer chasing me*"
"Sean Connery walks into a library and asks for a book on solo photography. ""Shelf E,"" replied the librarian. ""Aye that's the one,"" said Sean"