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Joke of the Day

"I can't. I'm busy tonight. I have to do laundry and block everyone who takes their engagement photos in a barn."

"Have you ever heard about Mothers Against Drunk Driving's lesser known sister organization ""Fathers Against Drunk Driving""? Probably not, it didn't last very long, it was only a fad."

"How do you go about picking up a nice Jewish girl? With a broom and a dustpan."

"Why Can't A Bike Stand On Its Own? It's two-tired!"

"The homework is due on Monday. ""Can I get an extension?"" The homework is due on Monday.png"

"You know why it's so difficult to put together a baseball team of egotists? Everyone wants to play first."

"What is the proper weight for a lawyer? About 3 pounds .......not counting the urn!"

"How many Frenchman does it take to defend France? I don't know. They've never tried."

"What if Obama keeps the nuclear codes in a folder on his desktop called ""Missile-aneous""? That'd be cute."

"DATING IN THE 1800s 1) Get telegram from Mae 2) Wait to respond. Don't be desperate 3) Get telegram that Mae died of dysentery while waiting"