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Joke of the Day

"DATING IN THE 1800s 1) Get telegram from Mae 2) Wait to respond. Don't be desperate 3) Get telegram that Mae died of dysentery while waiting"

"What did the camel toe say to the moose nuckle on New Years eve? Let's get toe up!"

"Q: What side of the dog has the most fur? - A: The Outside."

"For Earth Day, turn on your air conditioner and open your doors and windows. If we all work together, we can totally cool this planet."

"FOX NEWS: ONE WINTER STORM DISPROVES GLOBAL WARMING BUT MORE THAN A BILLION PEACEFUL MUSLIMS ARE AN EXCEPTION TO THE RULE"

"On one hand, this sub has gotten a little stale. On the other hand... ... you have different fingers."

"Damn autocorrect... It's always making me say things I didn't Nintendo"

"What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? Convincing their family to consent to it!"

"What do you call a woman who pleasures herself with a vegetable? Mrs Hawking."

"What do Japanese Cannibals Eat Raw-men"