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Joke of the Day

"People keep telling me that I have a higher chance of getting mugged in London than in New York. Well, what do they expect, I don't live in New York."

"""I see people."" - The Fifth Sense"

"Me: Thanks for the sex. Me: You're welcome. Me: Maybe next time we can have another person in the room. Me: That'd be nice."

"Q: What is the difference between a cello and a coffin? A: The coffin has the corpse on the inside."

"Tattoos are like dead babies Even if you peel the skin, they're still there"

"Why are Astronauts seen as condescending? Because all they do is look down at people."

"haha just plucked a shoulder hair so long it could only have been written by George R.R. Martin, who is widely known for abjuring brevity in"

"So my ex-wife is a bird lover... she always wanted a black cockatoo"

"Jokes about stuttering are a big big no no"

"How much longer until we can get pets that are also wifi hotspots?"