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Joke of the Day

"Why fart and waste it? When you can burp and taste it."

"I never understood what liking large asses had to do with being fallacious, but who am I to question the genius of a knighted rapper."

"What evil do the USA and Darth Vader have in common? Using imperial units."

"Do you like long lines, mass transit and sweaty white people? Ask your doctor if a Disney trip is right for you."

"Donald Trump said he thinks we made the right decision to leave the EU. This confirms that we absolutely did not make the right decision."

"Local news : box full of kittens mistaken for a bomb. I have to go to this town. I may be mistaken for Megan Fox."

"Tits are like Lego bricks... They're there for the kid, but dad ends up playing with them."

"I always clench up before I drive into a tunnel because I'm afraid Wile E. Coyote might have just drawn it on there."

"Well well well if it isn't my old nemesis, long division."

"What do you call an ISIS member who loves himself? A nISISist"