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Joke of the Day

"Donald Trump said he thinks we made the right decision to leave the EU. This confirms that we absolutely did not make the right decision."

"Why don't they give hurricanes epic names like cyclone of doom or the fate fairy instead of frikken Sandy...."

"When my girlfriend dumped me I spent 8 hours making a replica of her house and her on Sims, then burning it down. Easiest way to move on."

"On went on a cruise last week and fell into... the Aft hole. I was stuck in that aft hole for two weeks. Source: Impractical Jokers"

"Why eat a carrot when you can just as easily not eat a carrot?"

"DOCTOR: If you don't exercise, there's really no point in dieting. ME: I can't wait to tell my wife the good news."

"Teacher: Frd give me a sentence starting with ""I."" Fred: I is . . . Teacher: No Fred. You must always say ""I am."" Fred: Oh right. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."

"MTV giving awards for music is the same as Fox News giving an award for unbiased journalism."

"What's your best one-liner?"

"A cannibal tried a bite of my kidney He said it was offal"