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Joke of the Day

"Q: How many Sagittarians does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Look ask me when I get back from India okay?"

"A pencil sketch artists' greatest dilemma..... 2B or not 2B?"

"*Food hits floor* Little germs: GET IT!!! King Germ: NO! We must wait 5 seconds!"

"How many Norwegians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 7"

"How do you guys feel about that new drug-resistant superbug? It makes me sick."

"Olympic track makes you feel like you witnesed a crime, because you hear a gunshot and then see a bunch of black guys hauling ass."

"My doctor just told me I have Alzheimers... The only thing I can do now is figure out why I'm at this hospital"

"Everyone is saying 9/11 was a joke, it wasn't. It's a social experiment."

"I avoid making friends by being honest with people"

"So there was a pediatrist... no, wait a doct- a... Gynecologist *that's it!* Anyway... I walk in and... ""Sorry, I fucked up the delivery everybody. Also, your baby is dead."""