116137
Joke of the Day
"*Food hits floor* Little germs: GET IT!!! King Germ: NO! We must wait 5 seconds!"
Next Joke
"I like to shave my pubes... It helps reduce the wind resistance and makes me able to run faster. You haven't seen me on the news yet because I'm too fast."
"An electrician walks into intensive care and yells: Hold your breaths, I am about to start replacing circuit breakers'"
"Am I the only one who calculates how many hours sleep I can get before I go to sleep?!"
"Q: how many vietnam vets does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: YOU DON'T KNOW! YOU WEREN'T THERE MAN!!! YOU'LL NEVER KNOW!!!!!"
"I like my women like I like my wine... Twelve years old and in the cellar."
"What's the hardest part about rollerblading? Tellings your parents you're gay."
"Why does the lawyer hate doing pro-bono work? Because he fucking hates U2."
"My lasagna just took a picture of me and posted it on Instagram"
"What is Marios favorite type of pants? Denim Denim Denim"