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Joke of the Day

"""Sure it's a dental PRACTICE, but dont fret, I know what I'm doing. Open wide."" *opens wide* ""Ok which ones are the teeths? Where are teeth"""

"""14 years, 20 billion later and my team have finally finished building a Large Hadron Kaleidoscope."" ""You mean Collider?"" ""Oh shit!"""

"[OC] Kid: I just shat gold Parents: Wow, finally something good came out of you"

"What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, it wouldn't come anyway."

"What do you get if you cross Donald Trump with a reddit user? your mother"

"The cool thing about being happy is you get to live in crippling fear that it will all go away soon"

"If there are liberal arts colleges, why aren't there any conservative arts colleges? Well, there used to be conservative arts colleges, but they were all defunded."

"New rule for football: when a player is at the bottom of a pile after being tackled everyone on top has to whisper to him a compliment"

"I think my niece has a burgeoning slip 'n slide addiction Once you go down one, it's just a slippery slope."

"I just saw Avatar and I've got one thing to say: Blue Man Group ROCKED!"