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Joke of the Day

"Having to get just a cucumber at the store can be awkward. Especially if you panic & say, ""It's not what you think, it just for a salad."""

Next Joke
 
"I can't remember this joke. This joke had a sadist, masochis, murderer, rapist, and some other guys all talking about what they were going to do to a cat. Does anyone know what I'm talking about?"
"Would you like to buy a car for half price* *half the price of two."
"Pimp my ride I've just ordered the personal number plate BAA BAA. Should look cool on my black jeep."
"I'd imagine homeless people aren't the biggest fans of little dogs wearing sweaters."
"Why was Thor disappointed by his birthday party? Because it was more Loki than he wanted."
"Me: WHAT DO WE WANT?! Him: ""Nothing. I'm good."" WHEN DO WE WANT IT? ""Seriously, knock it off."" I GOT A NEW BULLHORN! ""I can see that.."
"Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin, it tastes the same but you know it ain't quite right."
"Did you hear about the guy who was frozen to absolute zero? Don't worry he was OK."
"Why do rappers make bad carpenters? Because they measure 5.5 to 6 inches as 8 to 13 inches."