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Joke of the Day

"Just once I'd like to wake up as eager to start the day as my p*nis is."

"Enjoy your animal shaped biscuits. Do not eat if seal is broken."

"I'm going to combine a sex shop and a restaurant... The motto is going to be ""First come first serve""."

"What happened to the gay wizard? (mildly offensive maybe) He went off with a poof."

"Why did the band 999 megabytes break up? Because they couldn't get a gig."

"I'm in favour of same sex marriage That's mainly because I've been having the same sex with my wife for the past 20 years"

"What's imaginary that my girlfriend and I afraid to forget? My girlfriend"

"My landlord wanted to come talk to me about the high heating bill I told him, ""My door is always open""."

"What's the difference between up and down? It all depends on how you look at it"

"Dude just knocked on my door... selling raffle tickets for black orphans, I said fuck that, with my luck I'd probably win one."