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Joke of the Day

"I made up a word today! Plagiarism."

"Two guys walk into a bar... ...tender. Wait, what the hell?!"

"Black kids play NBA 2K... and then go to the basketball court to be like their favorite player. White kids play Call of Duty, then go to school to get the highest kill streak possible."

"Is the reason why all of the Pokemon professors are named after trees because They embark you on your journey?"

"You'll never get hemorrhoids... because you're a perfect asshole."

"Writing ""Omg you guys are still friends after what she said about you???"" on every group photo of girls I see on Instagram"

"Hear about psych on netflix? Thats messed up"

"Doc: Let's check your reflexes. Me: I have the reflexes of a cat. Doc: *hits my knee with a hammer* Me: MEOW! *scratches Doc's eyes out*"

"Women's rights. want to laf again? **WOMYNS RITES!!!** el oh el"

"I like guys marrying my sister like I like my pinata coladas Full of rum! (Currently attempting to write a best man speech for my soon to be brother in law)"