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Joke of the Day

"Wayne Rooney said he wants to be a manager after he retires ""Burger King or McDonalds"" was his response when asked where."

"The worst analogy ever is like pudding."

"It's not really murder if you're already dead to me."

"A great joke/insult to make fun of a friend/enemy. [Insert name] was signing up for a website and types in ""MYPENIS"" for his password, and the website said, ""Password is too short."""

"A rich guy walks by.. When someone asks,""What's that smell?"" The man turns around and says,""I'm sorry, it must be my Elon Musk."""

"My wife and I were talking about obscure animals. She said, ""I want to get a manatee."" ""That's very generous,"" I replied, ""I take it with two sugars."""

"What's similar between drinking American beer and screwing in in a canoe? They're both fucking near water"

"(NSFW) They've finally published my self-help book about having sex with herbs It's about fucking thyme."

"""Fraud"" Our teacher put an ugly dried up amphibian specimen on the lab table and asked: So. Is it a FROG or a TOAD? Murph: It is a ""FRAUD""."

"what do anal sex and vegetables have in common? you enjoy both more as an adult if they arent forced on you as a child."