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Joke of the Day

"I wish I was Jesus so instead of listening to the same Christmas songs every day if the office, I could be dead."

"There's that man in Utah that makes cheese all by himself. They call him the Provo Lone guy."

"I'm also not racist/ I think everyone should own a black person."

"Diner: Waitress the portions are getting smaller. Waiter: It's just an optical illusion. It's just that the restaurant has been enlarged."

"(Utterly awful joke ahead) What do you call a scar left by the Swedish Chef? A borkmark."

"this is the police, we have u surrounded come out with your hands on ur head, then ur shoulders, okay good now knees and toes knees and toes"

"Donald Trump is sponsoring a new breakfast side dish. Dic-tater tots."

"FB is the Flanders of social media, Twitter is Moe."

"""Press the cube root of the 11th digit of pi divided by .5 and doubled if you'd like to speak with a customer service representative."""

"I can't get enough minimalism."