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Joke of the Day

"LIFE HACK: If you want to remember something write it upside down on the back of your underwear waistband. You'll see it when you're pooping"

"Why do American's take letters out of words? Because they're lazy, and they hate U."

"What do you call a little Mexican child? A paragraph, because he's too short to be an essay."

"An eight-year-old kid says t his dad ""When I grow up I want to be a musician."" The dad says ""I am sorry -- can't have it both ways."""

"How does Frodo make his own food? Through Frodosynthesis"

"""What do you mean there's not a secret passageway?"" ""Sir, this is a library."" *whispers* ""What do you mean there's not a secret passageway?"""

"My doctor told me not to lift anything heavy! Now I have to sit down when I pee."

"Why did the friendzone kid love to spoon? Because sleeping on your side prevents suffocation"

"A recent study concluded that chickens lay more eggs when they get music in their coops... But only if it is Bach."

"I spent most of my money on beer and women. The rest I just wasted."