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Joke of the Day

"An eight-year-old kid says t his dad ""When I grow up I want to be a musician."" The dad says ""I am sorry -- can't have it both ways."""

"The only time a man has ever asked me ""do you have a sister?"" was just to make sure he avoided dating her too."

"Sex is like pizza... If you are using bbq sauce, you better know what the fuck you are doing."

"""I'm dreaming about mashed potatoes"" Oh because Thanksgiving is tomorrow ""No, just a normal mashed potato dream like usual"""

"I refuse to be an organ donor. Mainly because I'd like to be a fully-functional zombie if I rise for the apocalypse."

"Wife: What's the Harlem shake? Me: I don't know, I think they sell them at Burger King?"

"eyebro What did one eyebrow say to the other eyebrow when leaving? Eyebro. I will see myself out."

"A fish runs in to a wall and says... ""Dammit Donald!"""

"To err is human, to arr is pirate."

"Metapod really loves eating Margarine on his pokefood. Since its butterfree."