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Joke of the Day

"If a bundle of sticks with an axe in it is a fasces, does that make an OP with an axe to grind a fascist? Seems that way on 4chan."

"A Triceratops was recently found frozen in the ice... ... upon closer inspection it turned out to be a tricicle."

"Did you hear about the new heated children's gloves that would turn on and off without warning? They worked inter-mitten-ly"

"Accidentally got melted butter on some fried chicken and this is my delicious origin story."

"What's a woman ideal husband? An archaeologist. The older she gets the more interested he becomes."

"""Alright man let's crack open a few cold ones, it's going to be a fun night"" Said one necrophiliac to another as they walked into the morgue"

"centipede: *trips* *but for like, an hour*"

"Whenever a girl is talking too much, remind yourself that other thing she does with her mouth that you like so much. Might dull the pain ;)"

"Just because I've lost my mind doesn't mean I'm looking for it."

"I've been putting vodka in my fruit smoothies. Also no fruit."